Much of what passes for VPN journalism online is, in practice, marketing wearing an editorial costume. Across large swaths of the web, pages nominally devoted to helping readers choose privacy tools consist almost entirely of comparison tables, affiliate links, promotional copy, and star ratings - with little or no explanatory prose about how these tools work, what they genuinely protect against, and where they fall short. That gap between the content readers receive and the information they actually need has real consequences for digital safety.